Published by Starfish
I read an interesting blog that someone posted on their Facebook page and ended up in my newsfeed. I normally don't have time to stop and read every thing, but for some reason today I did. I understood the general tone of the piece; young mothers are overwhelmed. This is a statement of fact, it is hard to raise a lot of little young ones who rely so much on you for every aspect of their well-being. But this particular piece bothered me for two reasons: One, she was way over the top in describing how horrible most of her days are. She made it seem like she was a slave to her home and children and she had no freedom. She would occasionally pause and say something like, "Do I love my kiddos? YES, absolutely, in a most incredible way. Being a mom is a wonderful blessing." However, most of the piece was talking about how horrible her life is, it was near excruciating to read and I skimmed much of it to get to the point. Eventually I never really found one, other than her love of having occasional help from a young woman coming to her home. I think that was the point. But the title of her post was about her not needing God, only needing help.
My very first thought was, "Uh, God IS help." That is the second reason this piece bothered me. I would not survive as young mother myself if it were not for God. Every morning I kneel to pray to Him and ask in humility for His spirit to be with me so I can be calm and in tune to my kids. Each of them test me every day for one reason or another. They all have their own little phases they are going through, and I have to be in tune to their needs. I can't be selfish. It is really hard to not be selfish, it is natural to be selfish and I would be lying if I said that I was always calm and collected, but that is why we need the spirit in our lives so that we can gain perspective throughout the day, at each moment we need it. We need to be familiar with the scriptures and what they teach us. They give us direction. Motherhood is not excluded from our need to be close to God and knowing His word helping us in our lives. Getting in home help with chores and the children does not replace that need. Motherhood is not about housework and making meals (though that seems to be a great big part of our lives, that itself is not motherhood). Children don't come out perfect, they need to be taught, and personally I wouldn't know what to teach them if is wasn't for God and what he has provided for us to accomplish this great task.
I think, possibly, if I didn't have God in my life daily, then I would probably dread being a mom as much as this woman seemed to. I understand when some mothers might need someone to come in and help them with housework or watching the kids so they can juggle things, but I don't think you either have God or you have help, I think you ALWAYS need Gold's help, and sometimes you need another person's help.
Also while reading that blog piece I wondered how helpful her husband must be. She made mention of him coming home and wanting to say, "You take care of them!" Why should she feel like that? Why should she feel like she had no freedom if her husband were giving her real breaks now and then? When my husband is home with us, he takes on an equal amount of responsibility for the kids as I do. Isn't that how it should be? That way my load is unburdened a bit for the rest of the day and it makes it all worth it. Thank you to my husband who makes real and honest efforts to make my life easier. I'm so glad I'm not married to the guy this woman is married to.
